Do You Talk To Your Golf Ball?
By mustang6560 on 4/27/12
I recently played golf with a friend who did something I was not accustomed to - he talked to his golf ball after nearly every shot.
"Get up."

"Get down."

"Cut hard."

"Land softly."

"Go, go, go, sit, sit sit."
I am a fairly quiet golfer (or at least I was), so after the third hole I finally asked him, "Why do you keep talking to your golf ball? It can't hear you."

Au contraire, he said.

My friend is a former PGA Professional and he said talking to your golf ball is one of the most important nuances in the game. If you never talk to your golf ball, he said, it will never listen to you. But, if you talk to your golf ball on a regular basis, it will occasionally listen to you.

While his explanation was rooted in superstition, I decided to give it a try.

I now talk to my golf ball after nearly every shot. I can't tell if it's making a difference or not, but I noticed that it makes me feel better, which I guess is the ultimate benefit.

Do you talk to your golf ball?

Image via Flickr, kulicki

[ comments ]
Scott Shields says:
Lol. My golf ball and I talk all the time. Bite, sit, settle, get legs, gotta go, turn, cut, hit a house, go in. :-)
homermania says:
Get in the hole!
Banker85 says:
if i got a chance to golf i would talk to it all day havent golfed since 10/2011
jcstoll says:
I channel the golf ball - for instance, as it's sailing OB or into the drink, the golf ball shouts, through me as the medium, "You idiot!"
cvargo says:
One of my favorites is when I am out with the normal group on the first hole I will walk up, place the ball on the tee and say "Alright ball its just you and me today... I hope you brought your skirt today because I am going to make you my B****"
bkuehn1952 says:
My theory has always been that one should talk to the ball respectfully and only when appropriate. There is no point in saying anything when the ball is heading down the middle. A profanity laced tirade directed at the ball will only result in tragedy.

I trust the ball appreciates my limiting the exhortations to positive encouragement when it really matters.
mootruck98 says:
"Fine, just run off into the woods I didn't like you anyways!"
fishman says:
All of the time!!
Dusty23 says:
I talk to the ball all the time and just like my wife and kids, most of the time it doesn't listen
joe jones says:
I used to talk to my ball all of the time but it suddenly dawned on me that I was getting nowhere. It's just like talking to my wife. Half goes over her head and the other half goes in one ear and out the other. Just joking.
JuKu says:
"Do that once more and i'll dump you in a lake!"
joe jones says:
I have seen guys swear at their clubs. An old time pro named Ky Lafoon used to tie his putter to his bumper and drag it behind him to punish it for not behaving. I some time put my putter in a dark closet until it shows some respect. To each his own.
Bryan K says:
I talk to my ball, but it's in the same fashion that I talk to the TV when the 49ers are playing.

Now one thing I do that drives people nuts is when I hit a good drive, and I know I hit a good drive, I don't even watch it. I just walk away and put my club away.
DrLongballz says:
I usually talk to Mother Nature. She such a bi*** some times
Backquak says:
I've played with a guy that actually told me, "don't talk to my ball", caught me by suprise, all I was doing is trying to help him out a bit, I don't even remember what I said but it was probably, "get down" or "hit a house" cause he was hitting everything way long. I didn't talk to him the rest of the match, except to say at 15, "that's it, thanks for playin"
joe jones says:
Backquak..Suggestion. When you meet someone like that a) Take his name and number b) Thank him c) When you get home throw away your note and forget the jerk. Who needs him.
Matt McGee says:
I occasionally use reverse psychology on my golf ball. It's necessary now and then when the golf ball isn't responding to regular instructions. "Yeah, that's right. Slice! Get out of here! Go find some water while you're over there!"
pennsafety says:
I had a guy talk to ball twice in one round. I had two putts for birdie and when it was about 1'foot away the guy says great BIRDIE and and out!!! He did it twice and I had to walk away talking to myself! What a MUSH!!!
Beekeeper45 says:
My favorite, Run Forrest Run!!!
falcon50driver says:
I'm pretty sure it isn't true, but a guy told me he screamed "RUN YOU BITCH" after hitting a worm burner, And a woman watering her flowers dropped the hose and ran in the house.
David Yurik says:
"are you too good for your home?" - got to use that just yesterday!
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